Men, marriage phobia and dogginess
There is a difference between misandry and just a plain lack of interest in another person. Or many. Being selective is such a pain.
Today I had a revelation that I'm a total girl who thinks weddings can be the most beautiful thing to witness. That can be very different from the way most men view a marriage. I'm certain many men value their freedom, but I figured that men get married because they truly want to. Then I was told that men get tricked into it. This coming from the person who wanted something with me.
I was lucky enough to (in the same day) talk to an actual married man about what he feels marriage is. While he did confirm that many men are scared of it and do see it as a prison, he personally saw it as a means of self-completion. Seriously, that's touching. I read in a Self-Realization Fellowship pamphlet that it is a way of attaining one's better self by being one and together with the other half that teaches you to balance your heart and your head.
That same conversation allowed me to vent about one source of my misandry: the supposed dogginess of Filipino men. So here's the word: Filipino men are the doggiest dogs ever. They are most likely to have relations without scruples in astonishing numbers. It's almost as if infidelity is built-in. What did I have to say? Damn right that can be so true most times. Not all Filipinos are like that, but it happens too much to disregard that "stereotype." It very well could be the reason why most Filipinas want to date or marry out of their ethnicity. Too many stories; three of the stories I've been told were experienced firsthand by my mother. So I asked her this..."If men are dogs, and pinoys are the doggiest there are, does that mean we eat them alive?"
"No, you cook them first."
I didn't mean to sound racist, but it promotes interesting study to see how Filipinos acquired the stereotype of being prone to committing the most betraying acts of infidelity. Who is going to discount the agony of realizing your boyfriend started another family with 3 kids? And then realize that this is awfully common among our kababayan?
Men are so different. They are full of pleasure, happiness and pain, all of which paint unimaginable stories. Perhaps this is what can open women's eyes to the kind of warmth, happiness and wrath that they can and do incur.
Today I had a revelation that I'm a total girl who thinks weddings can be the most beautiful thing to witness. That can be very different from the way most men view a marriage. I'm certain many men value their freedom, but I figured that men get married because they truly want to. Then I was told that men get tricked into it. This coming from the person who wanted something with me.
I was lucky enough to (in the same day) talk to an actual married man about what he feels marriage is. While he did confirm that many men are scared of it and do see it as a prison, he personally saw it as a means of self-completion. Seriously, that's touching. I read in a Self-Realization Fellowship pamphlet that it is a way of attaining one's better self by being one and together with the other half that teaches you to balance your heart and your head.
That same conversation allowed me to vent about one source of my misandry: the supposed dogginess of Filipino men. So here's the word: Filipino men are the doggiest dogs ever. They are most likely to have relations without scruples in astonishing numbers. It's almost as if infidelity is built-in. What did I have to say? Damn right that can be so true most times. Not all Filipinos are like that, but it happens too much to disregard that "stereotype." It very well could be the reason why most Filipinas want to date or marry out of their ethnicity. Too many stories; three of the stories I've been told were experienced firsthand by my mother. So I asked her this..."If men are dogs, and pinoys are the doggiest there are, does that mean we eat them alive?"
"No, you cook them first."
I didn't mean to sound racist, but it promotes interesting study to see how Filipinos acquired the stereotype of being prone to committing the most betraying acts of infidelity. Who is going to discount the agony of realizing your boyfriend started another family with 3 kids? And then realize that this is awfully common among our kababayan?
Men are so different. They are full of pleasure, happiness and pain, all of which paint unimaginable stories. Perhaps this is what can open women's eyes to the kind of warmth, happiness and wrath that they can and do incur.
posted by Dawn at 9:48 PM
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